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Friday, December 24, 2010

Purchasing a Kayak...

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I finally broke down and purchased a kayak some three weeks ago or so after perusing Craigslist for days on end. In all likelihood I might have overpaid for the thing and may have perhaps even made what is known as an impulse buy.

Yes... an impulse buy... defined as the kind of purchase that women indulge in while shopping at a mall and the kind that guys splurge on while wandering up and down the aisles of Home Depot. It's like getting sucked into buying something that one only thinks they desperately need only to have a bit of buyer's remorse set in later on.

It's not like I absolutely had to have a kayak but I had seen other boaters effortlessly kayaking to and from the marina dinghy docks and felt as if I needed a reliable backup plan for my inflatable dinghy for which I had yet to find a reasonably priced outboard motor for.

Besides, I had gotten a tad bit annoyed about a partially deflated pontoon on the dinghy and of always having to pump more air into the damned thing which I suppose is how an overweight, balding, FOX News TV viewer must feel after having to re-inflate his blowup doll every other evening...

So I drove some twenty miles or so on up the Keys and purchased the kayak with delivery scheduled for the following day which turns out wasn't a sure thing. For you see, I had purchased the thing from a young man who had agreed to make delivery the next day while he'd be enroute to a college class in Key West.

While waiting for the young man at the appointed time I get a phone call from him asking me whether I was still wanting delivery that same day. After a brief WTF moment on my part, I proceeded to explain that I was waiting for him to show up and that not only did I want delivery that same day but that I had wanted delivery some twenty minutes ago.

He then grudgingly states that he'd be on his way soon enough to deliver the kayak after explaining that he was still nursing a massive hangover from the previous night and that he was still a little slow getting around.

What I didn't tell him was that I'd break his neck in two pieces if he didn't show up with the fricking kayak. Why I had expected any different after forking over my payment is beyond any reasonable comprehension because after all, these are the Keys and that's just how it is down here.

The kayak did finally get delivered within the hour and since I no longer had a compelling reason to break the kid's neck in two pieces, he drove off in his truck with his neck still intact.

It occurs to me that this same exact scenario was previously played out when I purchased my inflatable dinghy a number of months ago back up in St. Petersburg... an event that I previously blogged about in some detail.

On another note for all those inquiring minds out there wanting to know whether I've tired of sipping on cranberry juice while seated at a bar, I'll have you know that indeed I have... but I'll also have you know that I've been successful in beating off any urges to drink with a big stick that I found laying around the marina parking lot.

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